The Second Life Whore

I've been visiting Second Life since 2006, of course.. and I've managed to get around quite a bit. Not that sort of getting around but, in a social aspect. I've met homosexuals, transexuals, bigots and assholes. Bitches and guys who pretended to be bitches (and did a good job of it too!), and that sweet person all around.

But more importantly, what makes the population of Second Life as we know it, is the Second Life Whore. Here's my ode to you, sluts! And as a disclaimer, I'm writing this for fun, and its an observation. Take offense to this and you're my bud, then wow.. good on you.

How can you recognize a Second Life Whore from any of the other residents? Easy! If you've managed to befriend a very, very hot guy friend.. they'll tell you right off the back of what the 'whore' is saying to them in IM's. Mind you, this whore is very, very open with her sexuality, and isn't afraid to flaunt it.

"You're so hot, I could just masturbate to your pixels!" Yes, one Second Life Whore actually said that to someone. And it doesn't stop there.

"I just spent four hours 'thanking' someone for..." Yeah, out loud mind you. Tasteless.

"You are so hot! (Insert sexually explicit things that even make ME uncomfortable, and I'M AN OPEN PERSON!)"

Yes, that is your Second Life Whore. Every subject revolves around sex, god forbid they have something to actually talk about. When they do, its only one line.

"Great weather today." Then... "Want to fuck?"

Good on you Second Life Whore!

Now, there are some Whores who actually are the closeted dainty type. The person that has a million guys or girls underneath their sleeves and you've managed to lose track of who is who and what is what. You just tend to smile and nod when they're fawning over that person, right? I mean come on, if Second Life was actually First Life, this person would be in ICU right now suffering the draw back of herpes, that's how much of a whore they are. (But, you wouldn't know about it, since they're the closet type!)

Then here's the good ol' whore, the one who you actually can't bring around your friends. Why, you ask? Because they have that quiet tendancy to fuck them when you're not looking. People wonder why relationships deteriorate, because.. well.. STOP SCREWING ALL OF MY FRIENDS!

And then.. what almost all roleplay in Second Life is based on, the Gor Whore. You ever just have that man friend who's so immersed in Gor, he calls everyone brother? Or, they have those deep tan avatars with leather slacks and a bow strapped to their backs? You take them out of that enviroment, what do they see? Playground with lots and lots of Urth girls to take back to Gor! Yes, the Gor Whore who tries to collar all of your friends. The Gor Whore who manages to steal you away in private messages to wear their collar with the other mindless freaks who'll eventually be discarded or grow bored once he manages to wet his pixeled dick once or twice.

And last but not least.. the Instant Message Whore! This is the lowest of the low, not only are they closeted, but they could possibly be whoring themselves out to two different people while they're whoring themselves out to you. The Instant Message Whore in Second Life is easily comparible to one of those cheap and dirty prostitutes who wear cum stained skirts with the actual needle in their arms. Ripped stockings and all.

Yeah, those gosh darn whores! Makes Second Life fun!